Another Quick Update

Hello again! I am so amazed by how fast and far this blog has gone! I am overwhelmed by the love and support I am getting from my friends, family and people who I still get to meet! When I started this it was just a way for me to remember all this and a way for me to make sure I don't forget anything... I mean yes... I always hoped that people would read it and would like it. But it was never written for that purpose. And I am so amazed that it has been read! :) Now on to the update...



After Sunday and the let down about Jim not coming I did a lot of thinking... At first I felt like I was upset with him... I was very confused about the emails I had been getting from him... they were all short, almost detached emails. I really did not get it... his email to me had very good and valid points. And I was not upset with him for not coming I think I was more confused by the emails and I know I was a lot emotional about all this. But we all know how I love to over analyze things... as does half of my family... and everyone came up with their own reasons and why they thought he wasn't there. I love everyone of them for trying to help but it wasn't working... so I went to the source and emailed him... he asked me to call him so he could explain... I still haven't found the courage to call him... I think I am afraid of the answers I'll get.

I do talk to Danielle almost everyday through texting and myspace emails. I am really enjoying getting to know her... she and I have a lot in common and I know exactly where she and I will fit in to each others lives. Which is a comfort... Can you believe after all this I am still not 100% sure where I fit in?!?!? I am not sure where I fit into Tarin's life and into her family. There is no handbook on any of this stuff! It's kinda making me nuts!

Tuesday was my dad's 73rd birthday! Chris and I went over there for dinner, which was good. :) After dinner my mom, my dad, Chris and I sat and had a long talk about all this. They were telling me how many people that they have sent my blog to and how far it's gone. :) We also talked about where I fit in. I have never felt like I 100% percent fit into my family... I have always felt like the underachiever... I never went to... no wait let me rephrase that... I never finished college... I could never really compare my accomplishments to my older brothers and sister because they were so much older than me. I always looked at my nieces and nephews as the people to "contend" with on the accomplishment level... I have nephews who are going into law and who work for freaking NASA! I have always felt that I was the least accomplished of all of them. I have always felt that when my mom's poker group gets together and compares stories... that I would be the least accomplished. Same thing with my mom's side of the family... Now wait a minute... I know what you are all thinking! No one has ever made me feel this way and no one has ever pressured me about any thing like this. This is just the way I feel and my fears...

And now with Tarin's family I still don't know were I am going to fit in. Tarin and I are going to dinner tonight to talk about things. I missed a lot at the first meeting so this is my chance to catch up on everything I missed and on things I am dying to know!

So keep your eyes out for a new post soon!

Love to you all!